supernutjapan (supernutjapan) wrote,

Rewatching 5-3 Free to Be You and Me

Sam and Dean living apart from eachother... isn't this the first time since the pilot? I mean we saw Sam go off to find dad on his own in Scarecrow and then leaving again to do what he wanted/thought was necessary (Hunted and When the Levee Breaks/Lucifer Rising) in Season 2 and 4, but we have Sam trying to live a simple life here which is fascinating to see. DAMN he looks good as a bartender. And that silent suffering he's going through just makes it even hotter. (So, you know, anyone who feels like writing a bartender Sam Wesson /businessman Dean Smith fic... let me know.)

Ehem...More importantly though, just as Dean finds out about being Michael's vessel in Sympathy for the Devil, so does Sam find out about being Lucifer's vessel in this episode. And you guys Sam is just in so much pain. It's just too much. By the next episode, Sam realizes that he can't handle this problem without Dean.  Dean on the other hand, I am not sure what he is thinking in this episode.  I always thought that Dean is telling the truth when he tells Cas that he is happier without Sam.  But watching it again, I notice little glances and expressions that make me think that he's not telling the exact truth. But then we have him denying Sam in the next episode so... hmmm...

OK, I best get started before this goes any further.

(A note for new friends - All gifs and images are linked to larger counterparts so, if the gifs are a bit too small, click on it for the bigger version ;))

"Simple Man" by Lynyrd Skynyrd(plays over the Sam and Dean montage in the beginning)
"Devil Sway" by Swank(plays when the hunters show up at the bar)
"Blues Won't Let Me Be" by Left Hand Frank and His Blues Band(plays after the hunters leave and talks with the waitress)

We begin with Sam sleeping without a shirt (!!) and suddenly he senses something and "wakes up" to find Jessica.

JESS:Hey, baby. I missed you.
SAM:Jessica. I'm dreaming.
JESS:Or you're not. What's the difference? I'm here.

Now this is really creepy if you think of it as Lucifer. Lucifer misses Sam too. He thought he was going to be able to get at Sam right away when he came out, but Sam just disappeared.

SAM:I miss you so much.
JESS:I know. I miss you too. What are you doing, Sam?
SAM:What do you mean?
JESS:Running away. Haven't we been down this road before?
SAM:No. It's different now.
SAM:Last time I wanted to be normal. This time I know I'm a freak.
JESS:Which is all a big ball of semantics. You know that.
JESS:Even at Stanford you knew. You knew there was something dark inside of you. Deep down, maybe, but you knew. Maybe that's what got me killed.

Which is true from one point of view... although it is not Sam's fault. Azazel was keeping an eye on him because of the "something dark" inside of him, and Brady killed Jessica because of it too as we see later. But Sam as we know from When the Levee Breaks, blames himself for Jessica's death anyway because HE WASN'T THERE so everything Lucifer says shoves another knife in his heart.
JESS:Don't you get it? You can't run from yourself.

(Lucifer, you mean he can't run from YOU.)
JESS:Would you believe I'm actually trying to protect you?
SAM:From what?
JESS:You. Sooner or later the past is going to catch up to you like it always does. You know what happens then? People die.
people-die-sam-reaction300 the-people-closest-to-you-die300


JESS:Same song, different verse. Things are never gonna change with you. Ever.
Lucifer is certain that Sam is going to give in. And he will. The how and why is where Sam is able to change destiny. But Lucifer knows just how to push Sam's buttons - just as he did the other guy. He beats down Sam's resolve through Jessica's lips. and when he looks up again with tears in his eyes, "Jessica" is gone.
Going back one week, Sam arrives at the Great Plains Motel (Garber, Oklahoma) and finds the job notice.
12 15
And then that awesome sequence of Sam and Dean at their respective work.

sam-and-dean-cutting300 sam-and-dean-wipe-forehead300sam-and-dean-wiping300

I love the parallels - Sam getting a job at a bar and Dean investigating vamps, Sam cutting lemons and Dean cutting off a vamp's head (um... why is he using such a small knife?), Sam washing the bar and Dean washing his car... then Dean looking toward the seat where Sam would have been sitting...
And woh. He's missing Sam. Then I think Sam is probably missing Dean too and wonder if that whole sequence is in the minds of the boys as well. Maybe Sam is imagining what Dean might be doing as he slices the lemons and washes the black bar... and maybe Dean is imagining what Sam might be doing too. They haven't really been apart in 4 years! OH, and can't forget to mention that Simple Man is playing throughout... So this is a song for Sam, which to me seems rare. I always have this image of the music expressing what Dean is going through (but maybe I'm just not paying attention :P).

Dean is finished his vamp hunt and cleaning his jacket back at the motel when suddenly Cas appears and scares the living daylight out of Dean.
dean-goes-to-sink300 don't-do-that300

He then proceeds to stand a bit too close for comfort XD
Sooo love these scenes with Cas/Dean balancing the heartache of the Sam scenes.

Cas seems to have found out where Dean was by asking Bobby. Bobby knows all about what Sam and Dean are up to but sounds like he didn't tell Cas. Cas is surprised to find Sam not there with Dean.

DEAN:Me and Sam are taking separate vacations for a while. So.

Cas goes on to tell Dean why he is there. He's found that Raphael - the guy who killed him...

DEAN:You were wasted by a teenage mutant ninja angel?

...was "on Earth" and he wants Dean to help him "interrogate" him.

One good reason Dean should do this? hmmm... Dean won't get hurt because the angels wouldn't dare kill Michael's vessel, says Cas.  So Dean thinks Cas just wants him to be there as a human shield, but Cas begs - reminding Dean of the situation he is in.

CASTIEL: I need your help because you are the only one who'll help me. Please.

I think the "please" does it's magic. Dean's already feeling guilty for putting Cas in this position so...
And we find out that Angel zapping has an uncomfortable side-effect -
last-time-you-zapped-me-somewhere-with-text300 we're-driving300
(I told you I had too many gifs.)

Back with Sam, the girl at the bar, Lindsey, has been eyeing Sam.  He's so hot and seems to be pretty smart too - having finished the NY Times crossword puzzle in the kitchen.  She challenges him to a game of darts, suggesting that "when" she wins, she wants him to take her out and tell her all about himself.  Sam, knowing he'd never lose, accepts the challenge. That face... darn.
fair-enough300 sam-shooting300

But he turns around to news of fires etc - figures out right away that this is another sign of the end of the world and goes to his computer to check it out in Revelations. When he finds out for sure, he phones Bobby, asking him to send someone over to deal with it.

Bobby thinks Sam is overreacting. He's the best hunter for the job and he's right there. Why ask anyone else to do it? But Sam just can't, probably knowing that demons are involved.
While that's going on (a bit out of order here...) Dean and Cas are at a police station to question an officer since it seems he saw an angel (and didn't get his eyes burned out).

DEAN:All right, what's the plan?
CASTIEL:We'll...tell the officer that he witnessed an angel of the Lord, and the officer will tell us where the angel is.

you-serious1300 why-not-300

because-we're-humans300 we-lie300

yup XD!!
We have a nice little scene with introductions...
hi---dean-and-cas300 he's-new-300
And then we have such a funny/embarrassing scene where they are questioning the officer. I'm covering my face and going "Cas, just shut. up." And I bet Dean is doing the same inside LOL

CAS: St. Pete's
DEAN: Thank you.

When they get to the hospital, we find the guy a dribbling mess. Dean asks Cas if it would be like that for him if he gave into Michael and Cas promises it would be far worse.
qr t
DEAN:So is this what I'm looking at if Michael jumps in my bones?
CASTIEL:No, not at all. Michael is much more powerful. It'll be far worse for you.

(So is Michael lying later when he says that Dean would be OK? Or maybe he's just saying he'd heal Dean.) The scene is kind of interesting because the guy is sitting in a wheelchair like Bobby was, in the hospital, as Sam, Dean and Cas looked on.

Dean and Cas are at a cabin preparing for their interrogation with Raphael. Cas goes to Jerusalem and returns with some holy oil (which I guess Dean keeps for later use). Cas tells Dean that probably he will not survive the ordeal with Raphael (but Dean will), and when Dean asks him what his plans are for his last night on earth (remind you of Anna?), Cas is just content to sit there and wait it out (awww, reminds me of next ep...)

CASTIEL:I just thought I'd sit here quietly.
DEAN:Come on, anything? Booze, women?
DEAN:You have been with women before. Right? Or an angel, at least? You mean to tell me you've never been up there doing a little cloud-seeding?
CASTIEL:I've never had occasion, okay?

Now that Dean knows that Cas is a virgin, he decides to take him to a brothel to get laid. (As we well know, no virgin dies on Dean's watch.)
I think Cas is just adorable XD
 Dean plays the older brother to him and gives him some money, tells him the "rules" and makes me imagine whether there was a time he did the same for Sam... .  It's pretty obvious he misses his brother, even though he can't deal with the present situation.
He's just about to have a nice chat with a cute girl when they hear a scream and going to investigate.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 37
Seems Cas has been rather too intimate with the girl -
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 40jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 41

jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 43jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 45
DEAN:The hell did you do?
CASTIEL:I don't know. I just looked her in the eyes and told her it wasn't her fault that her father Gene ran off. It was because he hated his job at the post office.
DEAN:Oh, no, man.
DEAN:This whole industry runs on absent fathers. It's, it's the natural order.

Natural order... those are some words I am sensitive to now-a-days... But also interesting to contemplate Dean's thoughts on this subject. Dean also had an absent father.  Does he feel some special bond with these girls? And, it's also an important theme for Cas as well as we see later. Maybe Cas said this to her because he understood how she felt.

Dean though seems to have had a ball considering and he's laughing out loud as they exit the "establishment."
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 56 jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 62
CASTIEL:What's so funny?
DEAN:Oh, nothing. Whoo. It's been a long time since I've laughed that hard. It's been more than a long time. Years.

(There's a lot more crap waiting for you :( )

Then we go back to Sam, who talks with the hunters that Bobby sent. There's a bit of awkwardness regarding his name and then again why he doesn't want to go with them but they seem to accept it and are on their way.

Lindsey wants Sam to tell her his secrets and gets Sam to go to dinner with her. She is a recovering alcoholic and knows the look of someone who's addicted to something.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 73 jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 1 71
And we have a touching scene, where she basically says the complete opposite of what Lucifer says -
no-one-has-ever-done-anything-so-bad300 sam-after-girl's-speech300

Unfortunately, the hunters are tricked by the demons and one is killed while the other two survive but with thoughts of revenge. They capture Tina and make Sam tell them the truth.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 40jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 39
SAM:It's true. What the demons said, it's all true.

But when the hunters come at him with a vial of demon blood, Sam fights to stop them from forcing it on him. Two against one, and they get the blood in his mouth, but Sam spits it out and this time is able to overwhelm one of them, holding a knife to his neck. (What happened to the other guy?) He glances up to look at Tina who is staring at him with her mouth open basically, and suddenly he comes back from wherever beserk state and refrains from killing the dude. But now that these hunters know, it is a matter of time before they all know and they will be searching for Sam and Dean.(Too bad Sam wasn't able to kill them.)  I wonder what kind of conversations Tina and Sam had after this...  or if Sam just quit?
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 50
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 61jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 58jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 60jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 66
When Dean and Cas get back to the cabin, Raphael is waiting for them. Nice effects here.
He threatens to torture Dean again as Zachariah did and we see Dean's vulnerable face again (while pretending to not care at all), but as Raphael threatens, he is moving more and more into the holy fire circle and when they finally have him, Dean looks at Cas and they flick the lighter:
we-knew300circling-raphael300 it-was-his-idea300

DEAN:Daddy ran away and disappeared. He didn't happen to work for the post office, did he?
RAPHAEL:This is funny to you? You're living in a godless universe.0
DEAN:And? What, you and the other kids just decided to throw an apocalypse while he was gone?
RAPHAEL:We're tired. We just want it to be over. We just want...paradise.

So do these lines sound familiar? "we're tired" "we just want it to be over"... Sounds like what Dean says all the time. Raphael's voice cracks a bit too. And it makes sense if you look at it that way. I feel a bit sorry for the angels with their missing father, trying to do everything on their own and failing miserably. Dean reminds us of the girl at the brothel here too. It seems like EVERYONE has father issues in this show.

jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 36jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 38
CASTIEL:If God is dead, why have I returned? Who brought me back?
RAPHAEL:Did it ever occur to you that maybe Lucifer raised you?
RAPHAEL:Think about it. He needs all the rebellious angels he can find. You know it adds up.
CASTIEL:Let's go.
RAPHAEL:Castiel, I'm warning you. Do not leave me here. I will find you.
CASTIEL:Maybe one day. But today, you're my little bitch.
CASTIEL leaves. DEAN follows, pausing.
DEAN:What he said.

They don't get much from Raphael, who is sure that God is dead. Cas will not believe that Lucifer brought him back and he leaves Raphael trapped in the holy oil and they leave.

Dean and Cas are in the car - Cas is all discouraged by what Raphael said, but Dean comforts him, saying that he should keep looking if he really believes God is still out there somewhere.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 69jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 68
DEAN:Look, I'll be the first to tell you that this little crusade of yours is nuts, but I do know a little something about missing fathers.
CASTIEL:What do you mean?
DEAN:I mean every time I was looking for my dad when all logic said that he was dead, but I knew in my heart he was still alive. Who cares what some ninja turtle says, Cas, what do you believe?
CASTIEL:I believe he's out there.
DEAN:Good. Go find him.

Cas asks Dean what he is going to do,

DEAN:What about me? I don't know. Honestly, I'm good. I can't believe I'm saying that, but I am, I'm really good.
CASTIEL:Even without your brother?
DEAN:Especially without my brother. I mean, I spent so much time worrying about the son of a bitch. I mean, I've had more fun with you in the past twenty-four hours than I've had with Sam in years, and you're not that much fun. It's funny, you know, I've been so chained to my family, but now that I'm alone, hell, I'm happy.

And then Cas disappears and Dean looks at the empty seat for a while and then turns back toward the road ahead.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 83
Does he look like he's happy to you?  Or is he lying to himself about something he wants "really really bad"?
Then we have another conversation between Jess!Lucifer and Sam.  Unfortunately, Sam has a T-shirt on this time :P It's also kind of spooky how "Jessica" is sleeping with her eyes open and is so still.
jpgSeason 5 Disc 2 - 2 85
SAM:God knows how much I miss you, too. But you're wrong. People can change. There is reason for hope.
JESS:No, Sam. There isn't.
SAM:How can you be so sure?
LUCIFER:Because you freed me.

So this conversation is after Sam's talk with Lindsey. She gave him some hope, and he was able to withstand the temptation by the hunters so he has a bit more confidence?

LUCIFER:Why do you think you were in that chapel? You're the one, Sam. You're my vessel. My true vessel.
SAM:No. That'll never happen.
LUCIFER:I'm sorry, but it will. I will find you. And when I do, you will let me in. I'm sure of it.

Just as he is sure that he will see Dean at that place in the next episode - and they both come true (my understanding) but in a way that Lucifer probably did not expect.



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